![]() Sexuality is more than a metaphor for the relationship – it stands on its own as a parallel narrative. “Rather than looking at sex as an exclusive outgrowth of the emotional relationship, I’ve come to see it as a separate entity. In one of many moving passages, Perel writes: If a couple loses the psychological space that allows them to fully exist as two separate, sexual beings, they often compromise their sexual desire for each other. As Perel points out, desire is often connected to uncertainty, and uncertainty implies and craves space. Through this blending of their identities, they unintentionally extinguish their flame of desire. Often, they have become so close that they have merged into one. The concepts presented and the couples detailed throughout her book ring true to what I have noticed in my own clinical work. ![]() Other times, however, a couple may describe a wonderful relationship, and yet their sex life has faltered.Įsther Perel’s groundbreaking book, Mating in Captivity, writes of such couples with extraordinary insight and tremendous depth. So, if you help a couple increase intimacy and enhance communication, and you employ the sex therapy strategies appropriate to any sexual dysfunction, great sex will follow. ![]() ![]() A mantra of my post-graduate training in couples, family and sex therapy was that when a couple is struggling in the bedroom, that struggle is a mirror for what’s happening outside of the bedroom. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |